she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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