sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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