True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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