38 yer olds are good kisserssss
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize