I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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