it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize