Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize