I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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