margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
