2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I wanna passion pit in your ass
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
that may or may not have been my penis.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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