shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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