hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
