Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
