Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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