He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize