You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Randomize
