I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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