plz talk dirty to me
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Randomize
