ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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