You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
