We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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