I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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