One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
