There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize