I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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