why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
