Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize