I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize
