yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
