they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
