I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Randomize
