Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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