YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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