Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize