Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Randomize
