The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
