**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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