drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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