tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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