Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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