We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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