she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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