Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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