I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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