Me too!
oh god the rape fog is back!
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
