yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Randomize
