Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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