She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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