can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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