I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
