He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize